Reasons why it's okay not to have everything figured out

 Well hello to you my reader chums! Life is full of pressures and expectations from what is the 'societal norm' to the pressures we put on ourselves. Being in my twenties, it's a weird decade where everyone I know is at different stages in their lives and we're constantly comparing ourselves - and really, it's unnecessary. Everyone has different paths and I think many of us often forget that.

Reasons why it's okay not to have everything figured out

If you're feeling a little lost at the minute, here are a few reasons why it's okay not to have everything figured out.

Everyone's chapter is different

We're all on this crazy journey called life and I think what a lot of us often forget is that everyone's chapters are different. Stop comparing your chapter one to somebody's chapter five. We all work at different paces, we all have different goals and priorities and we're all unique in every way. Nobody's time scale is the same. If you're sitting there feeling a bit lost about where you're at and where you're going, just remember that your time will come. I can assure you nobody really has everything figured out, even those who seem ahead in life have their woes and stresses about where they should be as we all have different expectations.

You're growing and evolving every day

We all change every single day. Change is part of life and so is growth. Growing and evolving is the most important part of our day-to-day as we want to change, we want to learn from our past experiences and live a better, and more fulfilled everyday life. When these feelings hit of being lost and like you're not sure where you should be, know it'll come with time. That's the whole point in growing and evolving - we're forming into the people we are destined to be, and with that, the right opportunities will come your way.

We all have ups and downs

Nobody is happy all the time. I think a lot of us expect happiness to be an everyday occurrence, however, we all have ups and downs, even the happiest of individuals. Once you come to realise this fact, you'll find yourself comparing less and feeling more assurance in knowing you don't have everything figured out - because many people are in a similar boat. It's part of life to ride a rollercoaster and experience incredible highs and life-changing lows.

Life is a journey, not a final destination

This may sound a little cliche and cheesy, however, it really is something I've learnt and embraced as I've got older. Every day is different. Life is about constantly learning new things and using those things to push us forward in our goals and plans. The journey can be hard but with time, things always improve. And even though we all have our final goals, once you reach them, there will always be more things you want to do so there's no point in rushing. Life is a journey to work at your own pace and ensure you're doing the things that make your heart soar.

You're doing the best you can

This point is important for all of us to hear, time and time again, especially if you're feeling lost and low. You're doing your best and that's all you can ever want and everyone around you too. If you're trying your best, then you should try to worry less as you're given all you've got. You're incredible in every way and it's okay not to have everything figured out. You will find your way. 

I hope you enjoyed this post. What other tips do you have?

Thank you for reading <3

How learning to not care what people think will change your life

 Well hello to you my reader chums! I don't know about you but for years I was the biggest people pleaser and allowed many people to walk all over me and essentially take the mic as I was so nice to them. As I've gotten older, I've swayed away from this people-pleasing way of life as I found it was making me feel so much worse about myself because I was putting everyone's needs before my own and caring way too much about what people thought of me.

The truth is nobody really thinks about you as much as you think they are. All of us are so self-absorbed. We're all worried about what others think or what others are doing that often, we forget to just not care about those opinions and get on with our life.

How learning to not care what people think will change your life

 If you're struggling with the comparison of others or worried about what others think, here is how learning to not care what people think will change your life 

You'll discover the love you have for yourself

Self-love is the key to everything in life. Once you love yourself, you'll find your world opening up to all other types of love and feeling more grateful in your every day - and seeing life in a more positive light. Not caring what people think goes hand in hand with that because you won't be worried about people's opinions when you wear a cute outfit or do something for you. You'll love that you've done it and embrace that power of self-love.

You'll realise your self-worth

Self-worth is something we all deserve to realise. The earlier in life the better. It can be one of those things that are hard to accept or put yourself on a pedestal to know you deserve love, care, and respect. However, shaking off other people's opinions will help your self-worth grow a lot quicker because you're only focusing on what you think of yourself, not others.

You'll make decisions freely

When an opportunity arrives in your inbox or presents you in life, and your gut says yes - how long do you then think about what everyone else will think? Probably too much. And, that's not the energy we need. If you think an opportunity or decision is good for you - do it. Getting rid of others' opinions will change this mindset very quickly and allow you to have more freedom in what you want to do with your life.

Your confidence will grow rapidly

Confidence is one of my favourite topics to talk about because we all deserve to feel our most confident selves in life. A lot of the time, confidence is hindered because we're so aware of everybody else, what they're doing and what they think of us, how we dress, and who we are. Because of this, confidence can be slower to grow. But trust me when I say this when you stop caring what others think, your confidence will grow immensely because you'll be focusing on the confidence for yourself and embracing who you are.

Your inner peace will be so much more

Inner peace is something many of us struggle with as were always so focused on what's next in life and what we need to work towards that we often forget to embrace the moment and enjoy the now. This is weighed in heavily when other people's opinions are on you as an annoying smell. Removing them will give you more space to focus on the now and the peace in your heart.

You'll be happier in the long run

Happiness is a journey and I don't think we ever fully arrive at the destination. Yet, happiness to me is about seeing the good in every day, rather than focusing on the negatives. Taking away the thoughts of what other people think, will allow you to shift your mindset to focus on those positives, rather than falling into a negative space that they can sometimes influence.

You'll learn to realise the little things are really what's important in life

Sometimes, we get so transfixed on wanting money, success, and these big materialistic things as we see others doing that, we forget what the best things are in life: love and connection with others. When you stop caring what people think of you and your life, you won't set goals that give you validation, you'll seek more wholesome things such as good connections with others and being grateful for all the things that exist in your life.

Your world will open up with so many ideas and goals

How often have you thought 'I can't do that because x will think this.' Well no more. When you begin to not care what others think, the whole world of opportunity can open up even more, as you won't second-guess doing things because of other people's opinions. You'll simply just do them because you want to and it'll be the most empowering feeling.

I hope you enjoyed this post. What other things do you have to add?

Thank you for reading <3

Top tips for first-timers in London

 Well hello to you my reader chums! London is one of my favourite cities and a place that will never get old. I visit London a lot, it's only an hour or so on the train from where I live and always has so much to offer for a day out in the city. London is never short of experiences, things to look at, discover or learn and that's why everyone should have the opportunity to see the city in all its glory.

If you're planning a trip to London and are looking for some advice, here are my top tips for first-timers in London.

Top tips for first timers in London

London is very expensive

It's no secret that London is expensive but I always think, it's worth mentioning, especially if you're new to the city. London is a massive tourist hotspot, with enough attractions to sink a battleship so you'll never be short of things to do. However, because it is so expensive, you need to prepare before setting foot in the city and that means mapping out a budget. I would suggest you create a rough plan of what you'd like to see and do on your trip and bring a bit extra money than you think you need. As in London, there are always some hidden costs such as service charges in restaurants.

Despite London being a pricey day out or weekend away, there are ways to experience the joys of London on a budget including inexpensive transport options, free attractions, and sights to see as you pass through the city.

Tubes are a lifesaver and easier than you think

Tubes are the heart of London and it's not a day in the city without experiencing the rush and busy element that is the underground. On your first tube experience, it may seem overwhelming with lots of lines to pick from, however, it can be easier than you think. I swear by the London tube app on my phone as it's free and easy to use, and lays out the direct route I need to take and how long the journey will be.

Use the Bolt app for cheaper taxi rides

If you're not a fan of the tube and still need to get around the city, taxis are your ideal. London cabs can be very pricey and charge you a silly amount of money to get from A to B. This means there is the option of Uber which is slightly cheaper or the new taxi app which is Bolt, a much cheaper taxi ride that can get you to some places for only a couple of pounds.

Be aware of pickpockets

Like in any city, pickpocketing is a thing so I would always advise you to be extra cautious with your bags and keep them shut, especially in busier areas. I'm very lucky that it has never happened to me in London, however, I know it has happened to others. This means, take the same precautions you would if you went to other big cities.

You can walk to many places

Mooching around London is one of my favourite things to do as there's always something new and exciting to see. Walking around the city is possible, especially if you're in central because a lot of the big sights are near each other. However, it's always worth keeping in mind that London is very large and that you may not be able to walk to many places as quickly as you can get the tube. Nevertheless, it's a great way to see a new area of the city like Notting Hill or Kensington.

Make the most of free attractions

London is a hub for free attractions for every type of visitor, whether you're looking to learn, have fun or simply, find a gorgeous view. There are plenty of parks to have a picnic, museums, and galleries you can walk around, shops to take a mooch, many small business markets or food markets, and exhibitions that you'll fall in love with. Many historical sights are free as well - just make sure to do your research beforehand about what you'd like to see.

Book train tickets in advance

Train tickets are constantly increasing and if you're travelling from another part of the UK, this tip is for you. I always book my tickets at least a few days in advance as I can buy the advance single prices,  rather than the steep prices many train tickets can be. It's also worth noting that arriving in London after 10.30am is non-peak so I'd recommend heading up to the city then to save yourself some cash.

Make a rough plan before your visit

Before going to London, a rough plan is more than vital as the city can be very overwhelming if you're new. I'm used to the rush and the bustle and it's something I adore on every visit. However, if you haven't experienced it before, you want a plan to shape your trip a bit and give you some direction to what you're doing. You want to map out the areas you're going to, how you're going to get around, book paid-for attractions and restaurants in advance and have a budget in mind.

London is huge

There is so much more to London than Buckingham Palace and Covent Garden. I've been to the city countless times in my life and there are still so many areas I'm yet to visit and experience. This means you need to be aware if you're in the city for a weekend, it's unlikely you're going to see all of it. I'm sure there are many Londoners that haven't experienced all the nooks and crannies of the city. Plan your trip around a couple of areas and things to do to keep it realistic, and allow you to get that dose of London life.

Debit cards/travel cards are your best friend

I'm not going to go and say London is a cashless city, but it's rare people use cash in London unless you're at a market or in the quieter parts of the city. In the central area of London, many people pay with debit cards, travel cards, or any kind of contactless payment as it's quick and easy. London is a fast-paced city and its payment way of life reflects that.

London's food scene is everything

The food scene in London is one of my favourite things about the city because whatever area you head to, there's always a variety of cuisines on offer that it can always be so hard to choose what to eat. Whether that's top-class restaurants, quirky cafes, or endless food markets, you'll be spoilt for choice with authentic food from across the world. I always say food in London is an investment for quality and experience.

I hope you enjoyed this post. Do you have any other tips?

Thank you for reading <3

5 reasons why self-love is important in a relationship

 Well hello to you my reader chums! I'm a huge advocate for self-love as you may know if you've been following my blog for a while. We all deserve to love ourselves and be our own number one fan because each and every one of us is incredible in our own way. It sounds cliche but it's true and that's where self-love comes in to help us feel the love we should for who we are. 

Whether you're new to a relationship or have been in one for a while, here are 5 reasons why self-love is important in a relationship.

5 reasons why self-love is important in a relationship

It helps you not seek validation for love

When you love yourself, the rest of the world becomes a lot brighter as you're not constantly seeking validation from others around you. This is especially true in relationships. They always say you need to love yourself before entering a relationship and I agree to an extent. If you don't love yourself, then when you enter the relationship, you will constantly be asking for love, attention, and validation from them. When really a relationship is there to compliment and support your life, and the love you already have for yourself. Your partner can't give you all the love you seek as you need to find that within yourself. They can help top it up on days when you're not feeling it and support you, but they're not there to be the 'love yourself' remedy.

It helps you feel fulfilled in your own life and goals

Self-love is the key to loving your own life as once you love yourself, you love everything around you. It'll make you feel certain in yourself and what you want out of life, so when you get in a relationship, that'll fit nicely into it, rather than be the whole thing. You walk with a vision of certainty and fulfillment and that radiates around you. Self-love helps you see the appreciation in your life and gives you the boost you need to achieve your goals so really, it's kind of like a hype girl inside of you. And that hype girl wants you to be happy.

You will experience a healthier relationship

When you love yourself, you don't rely on your partner for every single bit of emotional support as you can hold your own and they just compliment it, the way a loving partner should. Loving yourself means emotional intelligence as you know your worth, you know what you deserve and you're going to strive and get it - which in turn, means your relationship will be healthier. You will know how to communicate your needs and expect the same energy back. You'll know how to be open and your authentic self which is the most attractive thing anyone can be.

It teaches you independence and value for yourself

We all deserve to value ourselves highly and think the world of who we are. You owe yourself that. A journey of self-love can aid this valued feeling because you'll learn to accept the bits of you you don't like, have the want to always be a better person, and love everything around you. This value then helps you feel more independent - as you know, this relationship is just a good thing added onto your life rather than your whole life. You can live independently and do your own thing and enjoy the exciting and fun journey that is love together, without thinking if you lose them you'll have nothing left.

It helps you set boundaries and standards

Boundaries are the most important things any of us can have because they help our mental health and wellbeing and know when enough is enough. This becomes more apparent in a relationship because when you know your self-worth and love yourself, you can put the boundaries in place to ensure your feelings are heard and protected, as well as allowing them to understand your triggers too. 

It's never too much to have high standards because if you have high standards of yourself, the same should be reciprocated in a partner and that's how you know you've attracted the right one as they're on your level with everything. Loving yourself will give your the confidence to own those high standards and experience the most loving relationship possible.

I hope you enjoyed this post. What other reasons do you have?

Thank you for reading <3

Book review: The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid

 Well hello to you my reader chums! I'm a big fan of Taylor Jenkins Reid, I adored her book Malibu Rising so when I received this book for Christmas, I couldn't wait to dive in after it being on my wishlist for ages. It's a book that had a bit of everything including a killer plotline, characters you can't help but love, and that thrilling element too.

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If you're looking for a new exciting read with a plot that'll keep you hooked, here is my full review of The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo.

Book review: The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid

Plotline

The plotline follows the life of Evelyn Hugo, an esteemed famous actress in Hollywood that was known for living a glamourous and scandalous life. Evelyn is finally ready, to tell the truth about her life and chooses an unknown writer, Monique Grant to write her life story - and nobody is more shocked than Monique herself. Evelyn's career is stretched over 3 successful decades and in order to reach the success she had, she made sacrifices nobody could ever dream of. As Everlyn finishes telling her tale, it begins to be clear that her life intersects with Monique's in a tragic way. 

Characters and relationships

Every good book has even better characters and this is one of the reason's I adored this book. Evelyn is a protagonist like no other and it felt a pleasure getting to learn all about her life and really discover who she truly was, and what she had to go through to reach her title. She was strong, powerful, and determined, with the ambition to achieve the life she wanted. As you can tell by the title, Evelyn has 7 marriages and I loved being able to learn the reasons behind the marriages, why they got together and split up, and how fame really gets in the way or changes things about your personal life, a lot of time for the worst.

My favorite relationship has to be between her and Harry, her manager. They were best friends the whole of Evelyn's career and I loved how they called each other family, even before they got married for platonic reasons. Their friendship blossomed over the years and I could tell how much they meant to each other and what true friendship is all about. I also adored her relationship with Celia St. James, which to me showed the definition of true, unforbidden love, in a time when it wasn't accepted to love who you wanted. Their love story warmed my heart and showed true love can be found and that we all deserve to love who we love.

There were many other characters I liked, but one of the interesting relationships was Monique and Evelyn. Monique is an aspiring writer working at a big New York magazine and her innocence and realism are what make her so likable. She's an ambitious girl like a lot of us, who has experienced the sad times of life including losing her father and going through her divorce. Her realism really made me gravitate to her and also show the contrast between her and Evelyn. I enjoyed their connection and the way she asked the questions about Evelyn's life, and how over time, Evelyn became a person to her, not a famous icon.

Overall thoughts

Overall, I loved this book for many reasons. The first is because of many of the lessons it taught. The book showed the price you paid for fame, success, and living a high life. It showed how people will use you to get to the top and how, what really matters is family, friends, and those who truly love you for who you are.

I also enjoyed the breakdown of how the book was written. Each section described the 7 different marriages and how really, the book was kind of like an interview-style biography. It was Evelyn telling her story honestly and clearly, and I could feel myself latch onto her emotions and each chapter of her life - and connecting with that. I found it to be a quick and natural flip between the telling of the story back to the modern-day. The book flowed well and it had a way of pulling me in page after page with more intrigue about Evelyn's life.

Ending

I'm not going to give the ending away, however, I can say that the ending was a bit of a shock. It brought the whole plotline together and was so cleverly written, I couldn't help but sit with an opened mouth as I turned over the pages. I also loved how the book ended on a note that Evelyn would have wanted and she something she had to do.

Love the sound of this book? You can pick up your copy here.

I hope you enjoyed this review. Is this book on your to-be-read pile?

Thank you for reading <3

The art of gratitude: how being grateful can change your life

 Well hello to you my reader chums! Gratitude is the key to living your best life. I think we all get caught up in a world where we dream of this fancy life with fancy things and success, that we forget what's in front of us. Practicing gratitude is an art I've fallen into loving and something that has made me feel a lot more positive in everyday life.

Whether you're trying to have a more positive outlook on life or learning to practice gratitude, here is how being grateful can change your life.

The art of gratitude: how being grateful can change your life

It changes your perspective

Being grateful is a game-changer when it comes to perspective. There are many ways to be grateful and the best thing to do is name three things you're grateful for every day. Over time, you'll realise that the things you point out are the little things out of your day and it changes your perspective on what matters. You'll begin to notice you're picking out the things that mean the most such as the people around you, food, water, and all the things we take for granted on a daily basis. It changes your perspective on making you realise what the most important things are in life, and why you shouldn't strive for the things that won't bring you ultimate happiness.

You start to notice the little things more

By practicing gratitude, it'll make things crop up that you wouldn't expect. The littlest of things will start to mean so much such as appreciating the sunset, the power of kindness, and small gestures of doing things for other people. Being grateful will make you be more thankful for the food you're eating, the blue skies, the happy smiles of strangers, and the start of a new day. It'll make you realise why life is so wonderful.

The materialistic things won't mean as much

Materialism is something that kills the happiness for many of us as we constantly strive for the next best thing, the next bigger thing to live up to the rich image that Instagram provides of the 'perfect life'. But being grateful helps us understand that materialism isn't important and one of the things that can make us unhappy as we try and validate our happiness through things, rather than the existing things we already have in our life. It'll make you realise that love, connection, and our passions are the most important things to create happiness. 

Reduces your fears and boost overall mental health

In life, as we set goals for ourselves, a lot of the time, they are unrealistic or have to do with the 'norm' from the pressure of society. And, this pressure is what causes us to doubt ourselves and hate ourselves, and make our mental health take a turn for the worst. However, gratitude is something that can prevent this pressure and can help us reduce our fears, and boost our overall mental health. It can help us understand and appreciate what we've achieved and know that where we're going is just as incredible. Comparison is the killer of all joy and practicing gratitude is a positive tool to help you avoid comparing and focus on what you already have - improving your mindset.

It can be a great confidence boost

I'm all for confidence, I think it's the most important skill we can all acquire and learn to develop over time. Confidence can be improved in many ways, using various techniques and one of those things can be gratitude. Practising and mastering the art of gratitude is a powerful thing because it can aid your confidence. It helps you overlook the comparison of others and appreciate the little things, and by doing that, in turn, your confidence will boost.

It's a stepping stone to help you reach your goals

We're constantly being told by everyone around us what to achieve and when we need to achieve them, that often the pressure gets to us, and we kind of lose sight of what's important in life. Mastering gratitude will make the vision clear of what your goals are as you'll learn what you're grateful for in the process and what you're striving for. You won't be navigated by everybody else and what Instagram says.

Start each day with a grateful heart and you'll always be smiling.

I hope you enjoyed this post. What other points do you have?

Thank you for reading <3