How to maintain female friendships

 Well hello to you my reader chums! Maintaining female friendships can be challenging, especially as you grow older and life paths change. I love my friends and nothing can match the richness and depth of those friendships. Years of watching each other grow, celebrating the big moments, dealing with heartbreak and making memories together that'll last a lifetime.

If you've got some amazing female friendships or have started a new one recently, here are my tips on how to maintain female friendships.    

How to maintain female friendships

     Have check-in points 

 Life is busy, especially as you get older and everyone is on different paths, whether they move countries, have a baby or get married. Weeks and months can go by fast and before you know it a year has gone and you haven't seen any of your friends in person. To tackle this and due to the power of technology, have check-in points. This could be a weekly phone call or Facetime, a daily voice note or texting memes whenever you feel the need. Each friendship differs from one to the next.  

    Communicate expectations with each other  

   We have friendships for different reasons, some we run into with every issue, some we catch up with every few months and some who are like family. Not every friendship can be the same and you shouldn't put the same expectation on each friend nor expect them to act in a certain way. Naturally, your expectations will come clear for each other and if they don't, communicate how you're feeling and how you can both show up for each other in the way that suits you mutually.

 Always enter with an open heart

Living with an open mind and heart is the way to enjoy every part of life, including friendships. One of my favourite things about female friendship is the pure love and connection we all have for each other and why an open heart is the best thing you can have. This allows you to appreciate every moment, love hard and enjoy life with each other to the fullest.

 Celebrate each other

     Life is all about boosting each other up and celebrating each other. I always feel so incredibly empowered by female friendships as they're the biggest cheerleaders. One of the best ways to maintain friendships is to always cheer each other on, even if you don't see them regularly. Whether it's sending them a text, complimenting them on their Instagram post or sending a celebratory card in the post.

 Set dates to see each other regularly           

                     It can be hard to stay in touch with female friends, especially if you both have demanding personal lives or you don't live near each other. However, putting dates in the diary regularly can mean seeing each other as much as possible and catching up on each other's life, keeping a meaningful connection alive between you both.         

  Avoid holding a grudge  

        I think as women, it's so easy to hold a grudge over the little things or get resentful if you're left out, and your friend doesn't reply or lets you down. But, grudges are not healthy at all and can only turn your friendship toxic. If you are feeling hurt or doubtful about anything, always talk it out with each other as this can prevent grudges or resentment.

 Try and be understanding of their thoughts and feelings

Being open to your friend's thoughts and feelings is the best way to create and develop a safe space and talk everything out with each other. Going into any conversation with an understanding mindset can help you deal with any situation or minor argument you've had.

Cherish every memory with your friends

Life is busy and can move so fast that sometimes we forget to cherish the moment when it's there. Whatever you're doing, whether it's a sleepover or going out for brunch, make sure you're present and put your phones away.

I hope you enjoyed this post. What would you add?

  Thank you for reading <3

Learning to slow down - how it has done wonders for me

 Well hello to you my reader chums! I love to be busy; I always have a planned weekend, holiday on the horizon or enough things to do that I struggle to relax. However, as I've gotten into my late twenties, I've started to appreciate the quieter way of life, slow weekends and learning to relax and it has benefitted my mental health.                   

If you're struggling to relax, here's my guide on learning to slow down and how it has done wonders for me and my mental health. 

Learning to slow down - how it has done wonders for me

 Life doesn't always have to be busy to be fun

This took me a long time to learn, however, life isn't always about being constantly busy, it's about enjoying the fun in all the smaller moments. I always thought I needed to have plans every weekend, ensuring I was doing something big and exciting, such as going to a concert, dinner out or on holiday. Yet, by slowing down and embracing quieter activities, I've realised that fun can be found in whatever you're doing and each activity. 

The little things bring so much joy

Life isn't about the big things, it's about the little moments, from watching the sunset on the beach, reading a book in the sunshine, baking a cake, shopping at the farmer's market to mooching around in your local town. The little things are everything and can make each moment special, especially with people you love. I spend quality time with those who are important to me, it doesn't matter what we're doing as long as we're together. 

Appreciating what slowing down is

I thought slowing down meant doing everything at a slower pace but it can mean whatever you want it to be. For me, slowing down is having evenings with no plans, not overbooking my calendar and embracing life and the little things that fill it. It's about appreciating the joy of a slower way of life and enjoying what life throws at me. I love seeing where the day can take me with no plans whatsoever.

Relaxing helps regulate my nervous system

Being constantly on the go isn't good for anyone, especially me. I always thought staying on the go would help keep my mind distracted from anxiety and depression, however, it can make me stressed and burnt out, dysregulating my nervous system. By relaxing and taking things at a slower pace, leaving space for spontaneity can help regulate my nervous system and calm my mind. 

Resting is productive 

My whole life, I've struggled to relax or didn't know how to relax and enjoy it, always feeling as if I needed to work or be productive. Though, when slowing down, I've realised, resting is productive. With rest, comes energy, a clear mind and more fulfilment every day. Taking things slow and enjoying little things can help you appreciate the bigger things even more.

Connection to people and nature is everything

Life is about what you connect with, especially your loved ones and nature around you. The world is beautiful and when you take the time to relax and slow down, you can appreciate the beauty of nature, from going on a beach walk or a picnic in the countryside. Being connected to people you adore and the nature of the world can make life a million times better and relieve your mind. 

Creativity grows in relaxation 

With relaxation and learning to slow down, my brain can thrive as I start to feel more creative, noticing what's going on in the world around me, instead of constantly being on the go.  I love how my brain finds inspiration in the quiet moments and how it can help benefit my mental health.

Learning to care less what people think

Caring less about what people think is a must we should all learn. We only get one life and we should do with it as we will. The world of social media constantly makes us compare and think we're not good enough or we should be doing more, and that's not the case. Learning to slow down can also help you learn to care less what people think and follow your heart, and mind, preventing yourself from comparing to others. 

I hope you enjoyed this post. What else would you add?

 Thank you for reading <3

 

What I wish I knew before I went backpacking

 Well hello to you my reader chums! I miss the backpacking way of life; I would give anything to roam around the world again with my backpack in tow. I can't believe I've had the pleasure of backpacking twice, once for two months and once for three months. There's something incredibly freeing about backpacking and how the world is at your fingertips - and every day is a new adventure. Whether you're moving across Southeast Asia, interrailing in Europe or exploring South America, there's plenty to see and fall in love with.            

 If you're planning your first-ever backpacking trip and feeling anxious, here is everything I wish I knew before I went backpacking.     

  

What I wish I knew before I went backpacking

You don't need to bring as much as you think   

The first time I went backpacking, I packed way too many things and my backpack weighed a tonne which made it a challenge taking it from place to place. Bringing too many things made the actual backpacking part of backpacking annoying and didn't leave much room to buy souvenirs and new things on my journey. Pack as light as you can, especially when it comes to clothes as honestly, you won't care about looking 'perfect' or glam up every day, you'll mould into backpack life and be happy wearing the same loose trousers and sandals most days (and you can wash things along the way). When packing your backpack, what you think you need, half it and leave as much room as possible.

Embrace the spontaneity

The beauty of backpacking is the spontaneous adventures and random moments which become the best memories you'll ever have. You may have an itinerary as detailed as mine with an activity planned each day, but the off-the-road adventures you take can wow you and the people you meet along the way. You never know what tomorrow brings when you're backpacking and that's the fun of it.

 Learn common phrases in the countries you're visiting

 Not everyone will know English wherever you're travelling and to navigate things a little easier, learning some common phrases can help you along the way, such as 'How much does this cost', 'Where's the nearest bus station?', 'please' and 'thank you'. It may be tricky to memorise so you can always have it written down to refer to on your phone.  

  Insect repellent is essential       

If you're visiting anywhere with a hot climate, such as Southeast Asia, you may be bitten a lot and some insects can carry diseases, which you can get ill from. Buying a quality insect repellant or bracelets can be a great way to prevent being bitten. 

Not everything can run on time

 As I love an itinerary and schedule, I'm used to things running on time or more likely, want things running on time. However, backpacking in countries that don't have a punctual public transport schedule or a high tourist population, may not run smoothly. It's important to be aware that buses can run an hour or two late and tours may not start when they say they do.

 The weather won't always be perfect

  I always think or dream that the weather will always be perfect when I leave the UK, however, that's not the case. Other countries do get rain, storms, cloudy days and cold weather. Do your research and prepare for all climates, such as tropical storms.

 It's okay to have 'nothing' days

Backpacking can be exhausting as you can be constantly on the move, exploring as many places as possible in the time you have. Due to this, embrace 'nothing' days and make sure you have a few days in your schedule where you can have time to relax and reflect on your journey.

Always bring layers with you   

   I say this for two reasons: one the weather can fluctuate, but two if you're going to certain religious monuments, you may need to cover up to visit them.    

I hope you enjoyed this post. What else would you add?        

Thank you for reading <3 


How friendships change in your twenties

Well hello to you my reader chums! Being in your twenties is one of the biggest learning curves ever and although it can be the best time of your life, it's also a decade for some hard truths and learning who you really are and what you want in life. My twenties so far like many have been like a rollercoaster for many reasons, I've experienced some of the best moments of my life but also learned a lot about friendship - who is my friend and who is not, and the friends I thought would be in my life forever, leave.

Navigating friendships in my twenties has been a challenging concept as it's the first decade of my life not in education, and I have to make my own way in keeping existing friendships and making new friendships. It's definitely been a massive change and helped me learn a few lessons along the way. If you're in your twenties and struggling with friendships, here is how friendships change in your twenties.  

How friendships change in your twenties

Everyone has different priorities

Your twenties are a decade of change where everyone will be on different paths, from travelling and making their way into the career world to starting a family and getting married. Every person has a different priority on what they want their life to be in their twenties and it's okay not to be on the same path as your friends. However, as you may not be on the same path, continuing and prioritising friendships can be challenging as they don't align with what you want out of life. These different priorities will either show how much you mean to each other or draw you apart and whatever the outcome, it'll be the right choice for you and your life.

 The dynamics are completely different

With a change in priority and different life paths, the dynamic of your friendships may look different. This could be seeing your friends less, having to put in more work to organise when to see each other or the easiness of your friendship may become more challenging. For example, some friends I only see twice a year in person and text the rest of the time, whilst others I call regularly and see in person all the time. It doesn't mean the friend I don't see that often I don't love as much, it's just our dynamic is a lot different. 

   Some friendships are toxic, and some are healthy  

One of the things that really came to head with friendships new and old in my twenties is which ones are good for me and which ones are not. I realised which friends were toxic and which friends were healthy and always had my best interest at heart. Learning which friends are toxic is incredibly painful but removing them from your life can be the best choice you make. This leaves you more time to focus on the healthier friendships which enrich your life.

You learn who has got your back

Your twenties can be challenging, whether you lose your job, break up with your partner or struggle with the first proper decade of adulthood. Whatever the situation, we all struggle with the up and down waves and who stays with you in the low moments will show you who will always have your back. Stick with those friends and replicate their energy.

You'll realise what you want and need from friends  

 Learning about friendship expectations has been such a tricky thing for me and it's made me lose friendships or stay in situations where I didn't know the right way out. Not every friendship is the same; not everyone can be your best friend and your first priority. You'll have some friends for a deep, family-like connection, others for a fun casual relationship and some you work with and enjoy their company. As their dynamics are different, you'll realise what your expectations are of each friendship - and how you can navigate that.

Friendship circles get a lot smaller  

This isn't everyone, but I've definitely found the older I get, the smaller my circle becomes. I started to do things with smaller groups of people and sometimes friends one on one, which to be honest, I've loved and preferred. Hanging out with people individually and in small groups has allowed me to grow deeper friendships and have that dedicated quality time.

You may lose friends or see people's true colours    

Red flags come alive in our twenties as life changes occur and you see people's true colours. If they really care for you and want what's best for you, they'll stick around no matter what.

I hope you enjoyed this post. What would you add?     

 Thank you for reading <3


Best European cities to visit in the autumn

 Well hello to you my reader chums! I love a European city break any time of year, especially in the autumn. There's something about a cooler breeze in the air, autumn sunshine and a quieter atmosphere that makes many European cities even more charming. I always recommend visiting European cities during shoulder seasons, especially in autumn as it's my favourite time of year.

If you're planning a European city break, here are the best European cities to visit in the autumn.

Best European cities to visit in the autumn


Bologna, Italy

Autumn is my favourite time to visit Italian cities and Bologna will always remain one of my top European cities. Located in northern Italy, Bologna is a city of incredible food, such as ragu, tortellini, cured meats, fresh pasta and endless gelato. Surrounded by mountains, the city has plenty to see, such as the Torre Degli Asinelli, Piazza Maggiore and Cathedral di San Pietro. It's such a charming place with quaint walkways, food markets and a rustic look, plus for a popular city, it's not too touristy. The weather in autumn is mild with a mountainous breeze in the air.

Porto, Portugal 

 For that dose of autumnal sunshine, Portugal should be at the top of your list. Porto has a charm about it like no other and it's a city of gorgeous sights, good food, endless things to do and the perfect location for day trips. I loved everything about Porto, from Clerigos Tower, Porto Cathedral, and bookshops to local markets and authentic Portuguese cuisine. From Porto, you can easily travel to the Douro Valley and experience port tasting and beautiful scenery. The best thing is, that you can still rock your summer dresses and hats.

Florence, Italy

Florence is in the heart of Tuscany and a region that deserves its level of admiration. As a focal point in the region, Florence boasts everything for lovers of art, history and architecture, with a delicious food scene too. Florence features the famous Duomo, Ponte Vecchio and Strozzi Palace. As a characteristic city, you can explore many stunning piazzas, visit Pitti Palace or take a train to nearby towns and cities, such as Lucca and Pisa

Amsterdam, The Netherlands      

Everyone loves Amsterdam and for good reason. A city famous for its quaint canals, there's more to the city than first meets the eye, including gorgeous museums, significant history and cute brunch spots. With pretty parks and endless opportunities to cycle around, you'll have plenty of things to do for a weekend in Amsterdam. 

  Edinburgh, Scotland

Edinburgh is a city I absolutely adore as there's something about its charm and character that makes it so special - and one of those cities you can enjoy, whatever the weather. This city has many incredible sights, such as The Royal Mile, Edinburgh Castle, Arthur's Seat and many cobbled streets to wander and explore. The food scene is everything as you can enjoy whatever you desire, including Makars Mash Bar.

Dubrovnik, Croatia

I'm in love with Croatia and really want to explore more of the country, including its beach scene. Dubrovnik should still be warm around autumn which means you can soak up the coastline without endless crowds and people, and make the most of the historic centre. Visit the city walls, explore the old town and eat your way around the city.

Krakow, Poland

Krakow is a perfect destination to explore all year round, especially autumn with a rich history, colourful architecture and great nightlife. As a must-visit destination to see the harrowing Auschwitz, explore the salt mines and the old town and eat as many dumplings as possible, prepare for an insightful experience.

I hope you enjoyed this post. Where are you planning to visit?

Thank you for reading <3

How to embrace the joys of summer in autumn

 Well hello to you, my reader chums! I admit, summer is my season. I adore everything about the sunshine, longer days, spending every weekend by the beach, and eating all the ice cream possible. I'm forever in love with summer days, picnics in the park, swimming in the sea, and morning strolls to grab a pastry in the sunshine. There's something about that that fills my heart with joy.

Despite my love for summer, I love autumn time. The cosy activities and winding down into winter, are the ideal time for introverts. Autumn is a fabulous season because of the gorgeous colours, cute fashion and cosy activities, such as film evenings, baking and forest walks. 

If you're not a fan of waving bye to summer, here is my guide on how to embrace the joys of summer in autumn.

How to embrace the joys of summer in autumn

Make the most of the daylight

Vitamin D is essential for our mental and physical wellbeing. Even though in England, we aren't guaranteed sunshine, especially in the autumn and winter weather, embracing the daylight is crucial. Whether it's getting out for a morning stroll, running errands at lunchtime or enjoying a cup of coffee in the park, make the most of the daylight. It can be hard, especially if you work a 9-5, but that's why it's even more important to make that time, such as getting outside in your lunch break or before you begin work in the morning. 

Eat ice cream every day 

I'm an ice cream girl and I love the hot weather, it's an excuse to eat as much ice cream as I wish. And, just because it starts to get cooler, doesn't mean the ice cream needs to stop. Eat it as you would in the summer and enjoy the small joy it can bring to your day.

Continue your outside hobbies

I'm terrible for this but as soon as the weather gets cooler or it rains more, I stop doing outdoor activities, such as running, reading at the beach or heading out on a hike. Don't let the weather stop you from doing this. All you need to consider is preparing more, such as wearing a rain jacket and layers, ensuring you're warm enough to partake in the activity. 

Book a holiday

My favourite time of year to go away is the in-between seasons because it's quieter, cheaper and generally in many destinations out of the UK, the weather can still be lovely. Book a holiday in this time can help you embrace the joys of summer as that's usually a time when many have that holiday feeling. Whether it's a city break or a beach holiday, enjoying a holiday in the sunshine feels like summer will never end.

Wrap up and go on a walk

I love a walk, whether it's first thing in the morning or an afternoon stroll. Walking is a fab way to embrace nature and the world around you. Granted, in autumn, it's not as sunny and warm in the summer, but that shouldn't take away the fun of a walk. Put on a warm fleece or jumper, your best walking shoes and bring a raincoat for good measure and enjoy the autumn colours.

Watch the sunrise/sunset

I adore watching the sunrise and sunset, both are some of my favourite activities and in the autumn, they hit differently because sunny days aren't as promised. If you're heading out in the morning or evening, embrace it like the summertime but with an extra few layers and a hot drink.

I hope you enjoyed this post. What else would you add?

Thank you for reading <3