How friendships change in your twenties

Well hello to you my reader chums! Being in your twenties is one of the biggest learning curves ever and although it can be the best time of your life, it's also a decade for some hard truths and learning who you really are and what you want in life. My twenties so far like many have been like a rollercoaster for many reasons, I've experienced some of the best moments of my life but also learned a lot about friendship - who is my friend and who is not, and the friends I thought would be in my life forever, leave.

Navigating friendships in my twenties has been a challenging concept as it's the first decade of my life not in education, and I have to make my own way in keeping existing friendships and making new friendships. It's definitely been a massive change and helped me learn a few lessons along the way. If you're in your twenties and struggling with friendships, here is how friendships change in your twenties.  

How friendships change in your twenties

Everyone has different priorities

Your twenties are a decade of change where everyone will be on different paths, from travelling and making their way into the career world to starting a family and getting married. Every person has a different priority on what they want their life to be in their twenties and it's okay not to be on the same path as your friends. However, as you may not be on the same path, continuing and prioritising friendships can be challenging as they don't align with what you want out of life. These different priorities will either show how much you mean to each other or draw you apart and whatever the outcome, it'll be the right choice for you and your life.

 The dynamics are completely different

With a change in priority and different life paths, the dynamic of your friendships may look different. This could be seeing your friends less, having to put in more work to organise when to see each other or the easiness of your friendship may become more challenging. For example, some friends I only see twice a year in person and text the rest of the time, whilst others I call regularly and see in person all the time. It doesn't mean the friend I don't see that often I don't love as much, it's just our dynamic is a lot different. 

   Some friendships are toxic, and some are healthy  

One of the things that really came to head with friendships new and old in my twenties is which ones are good for me and which ones are not. I realised which friends were toxic and which friends were healthy and always had my best interest at heart. Learning which friends are toxic is incredibly painful but removing them from your life can be the best choice you make. This leaves you more time to focus on the healthier friendships which enrich your life.

You learn who has got your back

Your twenties can be challenging, whether you lose your job, break up with your partner or struggle with the first proper decade of adulthood. Whatever the situation, we all struggle with the up and down waves and who stays with you in the low moments will show you who will always have your back. Stick with those friends and replicate their energy.

You'll realise what you want and need from friends  

 Learning about friendship expectations has been such a tricky thing for me and it's made me lose friendships or stay in situations where I didn't know the right way out. Not every friendship is the same; not everyone can be your best friend and your first priority. You'll have some friends for a deep, family-like connection, others for a fun casual relationship and some you work with and enjoy their company. As their dynamics are different, you'll realise what your expectations are of each friendship - and how you can navigate that.

Friendship circles get a lot smaller  

This isn't everyone, but I've definitely found the older I get, the smaller my circle becomes. I started to do things with smaller groups of people and sometimes friends one on one, which to be honest, I've loved and preferred. Hanging out with people individually and in small groups has allowed me to grow deeper friendships and have that dedicated quality time.

You may lose friends or see people's true colours    

Red flags come alive in our twenties as life changes occur and you see people's true colours. If they really care for you and want what's best for you, they'll stick around no matter what.

I hope you enjoyed this post. What would you add?     

 Thank you for reading <3


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