I'm still learning and why healing isn't linear

Well hello to you my reader chums! After writing my blog for nearly 8 years now, I've written a lot of reflective posts in my time, talking about my anxiety, confidence journey, self-love journey, and mental health in general.

Growing up with space online to vent and talk about these issues is something I'm always grateful for as I'm able to look back and physically see a documented log of personal growth. But, as I am getting older, I also realised how much I still learn every single day about my personal growth, healing, and how it's not linear.

I'm still learning and why healing isn't linear

Everyone is going through something in life and we all have our own issues, even if you're not aware of it or people don't show it - that's why it's always so important to be kind to everyone around you.

Whether you're going through something right now, have been dealing with something difficult are in the process of your inner healing, here is an honest post about how I'm still learning and why healing isn't linear.

I'm still learning

Life is a learning experience every single day and there is always something to learn. However, what I mean by I'm still learning is about my mental health, learning to love myself, and really still figuring myself out.

It's no secret that in terms of my mental health and confidence, I have come leaps and bounds since I was an insecure teenager, but that doesn't mean I'm fully healed, nor perfect in any way. I like to look back at my progress and feel proud of everything I've accomplished and all the milestones I've made and how overall, I do feel better in myself. But, it's not to say I'm fully there yet and that's still okay. Progress matters and that will always be the case - finding myself isn't a rush to the finish line, that's what life is all about. Ups, downs, struggles, and hardships are all part of what makes me, me, and us humans.

I'm still learning how to cope with my anxiety. I'm still learning how to heal from past trauma. I'm still learning to gain trust in new people. I'm still learning that I deserve good things and I matter. I'm still learning about healing and what that means. I'm still learning more about my own mental health journey. I'm still learning what I want out of life. I'm still learning to take pressure off myself. I'm still learning that I'm not a failure and am good enough. I'm still learning to love all that is me. I'm still learning to take accountability. I'm still learning that it's okay to have bad days. I'm still learning that it's okay to ask for help and support. I'm still learning that the right people will always have my back. I'm still learning that I'm not alone in feeling this way. 

And most importantly, I'm still learning how to be me, to figure out who I am, and be the best version of myself. 

Why healing isn't linear

The prospect of healing is unique to an individual in what they've experienced or have been through and how they need to process and overcome that. Nobody's life journey is the same and nobody's healing experience will be the same either. We're all different, we all process and deal with traumas differently and no two people's experiences are exactly the same - that's normal and okay.

Healing isn't linear quote


Healing is something I've learnt a lot about over the past year as I had more time to finally focus on myself and face the trauma I've gone through and take a harsh look at myself, what I don't like, what I do like, and how I want to feel better as a whole, putting all the negative experiences behind me. But what I've learnt, is even when I think something's behind me, sometimes that thing can crop up again and I'm not okay. And that's normal because healing isn't linear.

Healing is more like a wavy line, you'll have ups and downs once you make the decision to face an issue that you've been struggling with and getting the help you need. It's not one straight line to feeling better, thoughts will pop up, there will be triggers and reminders which can rebirth old memories and that's okay. It can be really hard to deal with but as soon as you make the choice to starting your healing journey in whatever area that is, you're on the route to feeling your best self. The best self you deserve to feel as you're incredible in every way.

I've recently been experiencing a severe amount of anxiety brought on by my past trauma which I've suppressed and as much as it's been hard to come to terms with, but it's important for me to realise that asking for help and support is all part of my healing journey. And, that I can get through it. I will be okay and continue on the route to heal. 

Trauma, your mental health problems, or any hardships you've been through don't define you. We all have struggles, we all have triggers and we all have things in our life we need to heal from.

Just a daily reminder that I'm proud of you for any struggles you're going through. It will get better and through the route of healing, although it may be hard, you've got the strength to make it through. And know, when those triggers hit, over the stretch of time, the level of pain does get smaller and you can get through it.

I hope you enjoyed this post. What is one thing you are proud you've accomplished?

Thank you for reading <3

67 comments

  1. I really like this post, thank you for sharing :) any process is not linear when it comes to feeling, and self-awareness- we just need to keep appreciating how far we've come and make the right choices we can x

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  2. Thank you for this post Della! You are right in so many ways and most times we forget that it’s not a straight path to healing. Thank you!

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  3. Gorgeous post, Della! I've definitely taken more time to listen to my feelings and give myself what I need. Healing is not a straight path 100%! Thank you for sharingx

    Lynn | https://www.lynnmumbingmejia.com

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  4. Healing definitely takes time. Hope your okay lovely & have a fab Easter 🐣 x

    Isobel x

    www.fashionistachic.co.uk

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    1. Thank you so much lovely, I hope you have a lovely Easter too x

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  5. Amazing post! Thank you for being so open and sharing your experiences! I totally agree with this and I hope you're doing okay!

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  6. Wonderful post Della. I enjoyed reading it. Healing is definitely not linear, and your words are reassuring to those who are battling their own hurt! Thanks for sharing. xx

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  7. Such a great post, you made so many great points! Also 8 years of blogging is incredible!!☺️ X

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  8. Such a great post Della, thank you for sharing your journey to heal! x

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  9. I absolutely agree with you healing isn't linear I have a similar journey with grief. I think it's really important to continually grow even as we get older x

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  10. Healing isn't linear at times, more akin to an unrelenting rollercoaster of emotions that's battled inwardly.

    Hence as you wrote, we should remember to be kind to others at all times!

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  11. Aww lovely, you are so right. Any healing process is meandering and of varied speeds. Fabulous post x

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  12. Great reminder about healing not being linear. We're probably most impatient with ourselves so this is a great reminder. Thank you!

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  13. This is an open and honest post about healing. It is definitely a process and shouldn’t be rushed. Thank you for sharing your experience. It will be helpful to others I am sure. Thank you for sharing.

    Lauren

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  14. You are ✅. The process of healing is not linear, but muntidimentional. Great to see bloggers like yourself that is shedding light on Mental Health.

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  15. Such a lovely post. I totally agree with the idea that both life in general and healing is not a linear process. I used to get so annoyed when I thought I had taken a step back with my MH. I was so caught up in thinking that, just because I felt better for a few weeks, I should be completely fine. But it's all a process and I think it gets easier when you realise that! Loved this xx

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  16. The biggest mistake a person can make in their healing journey is thinking it will be like someone else's healing journey. Healing is indeed not linear. I love that it takes us over hills and down into the valleys on the long roads and the short. It is a journey to respect as well as enjoy!
    Thank you for sharing.

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  17. I think that this is such an important post because sometimes I think that the healing should be over because its been a certain amount of time. Its so true that there are constant ups and downs, and it doesn't just happen. Thanks for sharing!

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  18. Such a poignant and impactful post - I think it's really important to remind ourselves how healing is like you said no linear. We all live, learn and heal differently and it's important to give ourselves time to process and not put so much pressure on ourselves to match someone else's journey.

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  19. Amazing post my love, thank you for sharing and being so honest and open. Understanding that healing isn't linear was one of the most important lessons I ever learned. It's made me stop getting too down about the bad days because life ebbs and flows - and it's the same for each of our healing processes! x

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  20. Suck an important message. We're always stuck on this concept of growth and see setbacks as failures but that's not the case at all - with anything, but especially not mental health. I think knowing that everyone is always learning and trying to figure something out is super important too X

    Sophie
    www.glowsteady.co.uk

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  21. I love this, it’s really true isn’t it? Life can be so unpredictable and really knock us backwards which can trigger all sorts!

    Corinne x
    Https://skinnedcartree.com

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  22. I believe that we learn our whole life and that is process which never ends.

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  23. This is a very powerful post. I am big believer in always learning something new. In the last year, I learnt so much about myself and my mental health. Thank you for sharing.

    goalofhappiness.com

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  24. Great post. You're spit on re healing. It's just a gradual process that takes however long it takes and whatever direction it needs to take.

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  25. Wow, thank you for being so honest and open in writing this! I can relate to it so much. Healing and recovering is a completely different process for every single person, and I've learned recently to not compare my journey with other people's! Great post as always!

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  26. What a lovely little read, I love reading about other people's journeys and your right life is a journey and everyone's is different it's what makes the world and people in it unique. x

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  27. This is such an important post Della. Healing is never linear and learning never ends. We just need to keep appreciating how far we have come. Healing and life in general is completely different for everyone and one thing that has changed my life for the better is understanding that my journey is completely different from any other person's journey.

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  28. Woah, blogging for 8 years? That's amazing. I really like how personal and raw your article is. It speaks strongly about authenticity and life in general. I agree --- healing isn't linear and it's always going to different with everybody. You've helped many people with this post. Enjoyed it! Thanks for sharing.

    www.lifebeginsattwenty.com

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  29. This post has moved me, I can't actually tell you. Your blog posts recently have shot straight through me and woken me up in the best possible way.
    I want healing to be linear, like everyone else. I want to click my fingers and feel better. But that's not the real world. It's hard to accept that but blog posts like this give my brain more time to think it all over!

    This post is going to be huge. You're going to help so many people i all walks of life, I just know it!

    Rosie

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much for the kindest comment ever, I really appreciate all your lovely words xx

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  30. I learn to like myself and cope with anxiety. Hopefully by the end of 2021 things will be better.

    xx
    https://anna-alina.blogspot.com/2021/04/my-line-of-shirts.html

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  31. This is a great post Della! I love that you have highlighted that healing isn't linear, and that everyone works at thir own pace. One thing that works for someone won't always work for someone else. Also its great to look back on your journey and see how far you have come, isn't it?!

    Thanks for shairng :)
    Aimsy xoxo
    Aimsy’s Antics

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  32. Thank you sharing, learning to heal is not linear, which I have had to learn this year, take things at my own pace don't rush to complete it as you will have set backs :)

    Nic | Nic's Adventures & Bakes

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  33. This is such a great and honest post. And so very true! Thanks so much for sharing!

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  36. I love how open and honest you've been with this post. The world is constantly changing so we are always evolving and learning how to cope with changes and challenges. It feels so good when you finally get your head around that thought and learn to accept it.

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Thank you for reading my blog! I hope you enjoyed this post and found it helpful in anyway. I'd love to hear any feedback you may have.