Why you shouldn't strive for 'perfection'

 Well hello to you my reader chums! Being 'perfect' and looking 'perfect' is something the media and society have tricked us all into thinking for years, and it continues day by day with representation and edited imagery.

I grew up in the Tumblr era where thigh gaps were the 'thing' and being skinny was everything to strive for otherwise you weren't society's idea of 'perfect'. It was exhausting and unnecessarily debilitating for my mental health at such an influential age, and really made me question my worth - and if I was good enough.

Why you shouldn't strive for 'perfection'

I spent years working on myself with my self-love and body-confidence journey to reach the understanding that perfection isn't real and is something we shouldn't strive for. We should aim to be our authentic selves, be happy with who we are, and do things that are right for us.

Whether you're questioning your self-worth or can't stop comparing yourself to the 'perfect' images on social media, here are all the reasons why you shouldn't strive for 'perfection.

Social media isn't real

This is a pretty obvious point, however, there are still plenty of us (I'm guilty) that sit and scroll on social media and wished we looked like the influencers in their tight bikinis on exotic beaches. Comparing ourselves is all part of human nature and having social media at the touch of a button, really doesn't help this. But I think what a lot of us need to remind ourselves is social media isn't real, especially Instagram. 

Every 'perfect' Instagram photo you see has been staged to show the right angles, planned for hours on end, and edited to match an aesthetic. The person behind it doesn't always look and live like that - it's their highlight reel, just like your accounts are your highlight reel. People aren't going to share the truth or 'imperfect' parts of their life online, as a lot of us don't want to be perceived as having a hard time.

Nobody is perfect

Celebrities, your best pals, or people you're following on Instagram, none of those people are perfect, despite how much you admire them. They all have bad days, they all have self-doubt, question themselves, and have moments they want to give up. They all hate how they look sometimes, make mistakes, and really are just normal human beings. Making mistakes is all part of human nature and nobody can live up to a perfect expectation as the term doesn't even exist.

Nothing can be ever perfect

Similar to how nobody can be perfect, no situation in life is ever perfect. When you're fully happy, you can feel like you're on cloud 9, but that feeling can't last forever, as bad days are inevitable. That's not me trying to be negative, it is a realistic fact - as if you expect to be happy and live a perfect life 100% of the time, you'll just be disappointed. You need to expect that you'll face challenges, obstacles, and hardships - and the happy parts of life will fall into that and everything will work out.

Happiness is a journey

This point is so important to stress. In life, you'll meet lots of people, some who are pessimists and some who are optimists, and you'll find those who live a life trying to see the positive parts of life are generally happier. However, this doesn't mean to say they've always been happy and didn't have to experience hardship to get there. Happiness is a journey because you'll have to deal with things in life that will test your happy energy and you'll experience sadness - and that's okay. You'll get there in the end and all the pain will be worthwhile.

It's an unattainable goal

Trying to be perfect is unrealistic, unattainable and really, unnecessary. It's a waste of energy trying to be this perfect being as like I've mentioned, nobody can be perfect and nothing ever is perfect. Things can be good, great even and you can experience the best days of your life, but that doesn't make them perfect. Instead of striving for perfection, strive for working towards your best life and doing the things that make you happy in your soul - that's the real goal.

It will make you feel worse about yourself

I don't know about you but comparing myself to people around me is one of the reasons that it took me so long to learn to love myself and focus on myself and my goals. Once I changed my mindset away from that, I began to feel so much happier with who I was and the confidence came hand in hand with that. Like comparing, if you strive for perfection, you're just going to be left unsatisfied and feel worse about yourself. Work towards having fun, creating memories, and surrounding yourself with positive, uplifting energy.

I hope you enjoyed this post. What other reasons do you have?

Thank you for reading <3

68 comments

  1. Love reading this. Resonates to me that- dealing with thoughts keep pushing me to 'perfection' should not be the way, rather embracing self-value is more deserving. Thank you for sharing this!

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  2. Striving in perfection is just going to end in heartache, because nobody is perfect! Thank you for sharing these tips, I try to aim for realistic goals and I think it's important to recognise how well we're all doing- even if we're not perfect :)

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  3. I totally agree with what you said. I'm a perfectionist and I'm always unsatisfied unfortunetly. I know I need to change my mindset but it is hard. Hopefully, I'll be able to change.

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    1. Thank you!! It's something that we have to unlearn for sure x

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  4. I used to work for a confidence coach and she was ALL about this. Progress not perfection because perfection is a myth and what you see is usually someone else's carefully curated and polished vision. Thank you for the reminder, Della! x

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  5. I loved this post, in a world filled with aesthetics and beauty, it can be hard to remember what "reality" is. Thank you for sharing! Amy at amymarshment.com xx

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  6. All of this is so on point AND so perfect! In the past if I ever started to feel down about myself, the first thing I do is switch off social media, it's so easy for people to share only the good things in their life and it often made me feel not good about myself. The "reality" that social media shows isn't always the case. Of course, it's not all bad, but it's important to remind yourself of these things, so thank you for sharing!

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    1. Thank you so much! You're exactly right there xx

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  7. Ugh you don't know how much I needed to read this today. I feel like my head is spinning trying to be perfect at everything and actually not being anything close!! I am so highly strung when it comes to my work and my blog but I actually think it's stopping me from enjoyment and growth!

    Rosie

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    1. Thank you so much, I'm really glad it helped!! xx

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  8. Perfection definitely isn't a single thing. What you see as perfection, somebody else will disagree. My "perfection" now is just to ensure that I'm happy and healthy. As long as my needs are met each day, I'm ok with that.

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  9. This post is so relatable! I think that humans strive to perfection naturally, but it takes longer for people to understand that perfection can also be something totally personal and a fictitious state that society impose on people - like being skinny and sharing only the good things. thank you for sharing this Della x

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    1. Yes, yes, yes!! This is so true - thank you xx

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  10. I love this post Della, nothing is perfect and nobody is perfect so it's better to strive to be the best you can be! x

    Lucy | www.lucymary.co.uk

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  11. I'm on tumblr for years now haha. I totally agree with you, media tricked us for believing these things. Thank you for this mind refreshing post!

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  12. I'm such a perfectionist and often find myself falling into never ending holes because I strive for that everyday! These are all super important messages and I need to remember them!

    Katie | katieemmabeauty.com

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  13. I think it's important to not strive for perfection, only to better yourself in a reasonable way. There's always room for growth and learning, but pushing yourself to be perfect isn't realistic, so it's good to be aware of that - though, it's easier said than done to NOT work for that sometimes.

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    1. Yes!! I completely agree, thank you for your lovely comment xx

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  14. What a perfect timing! I really need to hear this and stop beating myself for not being "perfect" enough. Life is so much more than just a competition. When I feel like someone brings that "competition vibe" out of him/her, I will tell myself time and time again "you can't have what's mine and I don't want what's yours" xx

    lenne | lennezulkiflly.com

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    1. I'm really glad you enjoyed this post! Thank you for your lovely comment xx

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  15. Thanks for sharing, these points are all very important, we all need to learn the lesson of it's okay not be be perfect :)

    Nic | Nic's Adventures & Bakes

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  16. I'm terrible at striving for perfection. So glad I read this post.

    http://beccamfletcher.com/2021/02/23/5-ways-to-take-care-of-your-skin/

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  17. Great post - especially the point about social media not being real! It's so easy to get swept up in how 'perfect' it all is!

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  18. This post is so true. Strive for perfection and compering yourself with others on social media is way to destruction. Perfect life present on social media isn't real.

    New Post - https://www.exclusivebeautydiary.com/2021/02/rodial-dragons-blood-eye-gel.html

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  19. This was a breath of fresh air to read. Everyone's perception of perfection is different, I don't think there is such a thing as perfect. As long as we are happy with ourselves and life that is perfection for me. Social media doesn't help, I've done it and sure many others have too, comparing yourself to others on social media, it puts a downer on life at times.

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  20. This is such a great post! It's so true that you shouldn't strive for perfection like that. Thanks so much for sharing it.

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  21. These are important things to remember! If we acknowledge that social media is not real, we can begin to disconnect what we see online with real-life expectations.
    xoxo
    Lovely
    www.mynameislovely.com

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  22. This is such an important topic to discuss! Social media can really warp our sense of reality and we should be aware of that 😊

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  23. I love this post, once I got out of the mindset that social media wasn't real, my life honestly started to change!! Thanks so much for sharing this post! x

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  24. Totally agree that happiness is a journey! And you're right, those people who you see on Insta, even if they are the same age as you, are not perfect. Instagram is a place to post the highlights of your life, not the lowlights. I have unfollowed so many people on Instagram if things they post upsets me, even old friends. Ultimately, you don't want to aimlessly scroll online if it doesn't bring you even a little joy.

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  25. You are so right. People (sadly) misconstrue what is “normal” when they get caught up in what is shown online.

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  26. I love this. So important and a lovely read, it’s about progress and not perfection!💘

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  27. Great post! the only person I ever compare myself to is past me. I seek to improve upon myself and not compete with others.

    Corinne x
    www.skinnedcartree.com

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  28. Realistically, I believe perfection would be boring. Our flaws and limitations keep life interesting, as they represent a challenge. Were we all perfect, there'd be no reason to keep going, except for maintenance. It's unattainable, but nice to strive for if that key fact is remembered

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  29. Completely agree! I always find setting and achieving realistic goals way more motivating than striving for something I can’t reach

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  30. Great Post! Love that you pointed out that nothing can be perfect, it's so true! There will always be small imperfections and the truth is that we're more likely to notice our own ones than other people are. Thank you for sharing.

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  31. Loved this post, i think its super inspiring! I've learnt from years of hating myself that there isnt even one whole perfect, your idea of perfect is different to someone else's and i think thats so true, it can be exhausting and i think instead of striving for perfection we should just strive for happiness!

    Ellie // www.thediaryofellie.com

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  32. I often think about this topic, you need to compare yourself less with others, especially in social networks, where all photos are processed in apps
    http://www.recklessdiary.ru

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  33. SOCIAL MEDIA ISN'T REAL! Such an important point that everyone needs to understand!

    Katy | www.katystephenson.com | www.thegrownupsclub.com

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  34. Really nice post. Perfection isn't real and isn't attainable. We just have to remember that.

    Anita x niannilifestyleblog

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  35. That's a nice post. I can totally relate to it. I was a hardcore perfectionist until about a year and a half ago. Once, I dropped perfection off my agenda, I have been making good progress and the journey has been less stressful.

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  36. I remember the tumblr era all too well and the impact it had on me, its so important to remember that its a completely unattainable goal and striving for perfection won't get you anywhere. Great post.

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